Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Everyone Remain Calm


So apparently when HostGator decides you're some kind of basement-dwelling hog, they want assurances that, sure, you USED to be a gluttonous hog, but you've kicked the Doritos and donuts and you're losing weight pronto. But they need time to watch/assess you for a couple of days -- I fucking guess, because we have been waiting all day for them to get us back up and running after telling them what we've done to lose a lot of goddamn weight!!! -- and we've heard nothing back.

I really don't think Donk had a thing to do with this, unless she got that hottie bare-chested tech expert to do it -- because after all, what WAS she employing him for, and the timing would be about right -- but while I am all for conspiracy theories, I am far more suspicious of the countdown clock. That's when our troubles began.

Enjoy our rustic cabin in the woods for a little while longer, Type-A haters, shitheads and sad, sort of sad adults. We'll be back up soon and in the meantime, are pondering another home that won't shut us out so quickly, just because we gained a little weight.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Welcome Back To Our Temporary Home, Haters!!

We do express our deepest regrets for our current crisis. We have no idea what's happened except that it has to do with being so goddamned popular and taking up too much fucking CPU space or some such thing. Math is hard!!! But the important thing is, PEOPLE LOVE US! THEY REALLY, REALLY LOVE US!!

As we get things sorted out, let's feast on this!

Fair, no? I thought it was a fair handling of this freak.