Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Mary: Blaming Herself For Speaking Out When Being Jackled

"The world needs you to be yourself."

—Kyle King (her weekly Wednesday post)

When I first read this, I thought to myself, “I pity people who feel like they have to be someone else to please others.”

But then I turned the quote around on myself (because that’s what I want you to do with these weekly introspective quotes). And my thought was not so nice. “I think the world might like it if I wasn’t so me all the time.” I’m a very independent, strong, and brutally honest person. I’ve attempted to tame down that last characteristic a lot over the past two years. Brutal honesty is only appropriate when your opinion is asked and then should only be offered to close friends and family. There’s no need to alienate acquaintances. I know, that seems obvious, but it didn’t sink in until about 25.

Apart from that, I still have no idea how to be anything else other than myself. And that usually means speaking my mind. But these days, I wish I would shut my trap and take a back seat when it comes to the little things. Only the little things. I think I would lighten up as a person, and group situations would be more enjoyable for everyone. I’ve tested this theory a few times and actually loved going with the flow.

I guess what I’m saying is that of course you should be yourself, but don’t shut the door on evolving your character. ”That’s just me” is often an excuse for something you know is a flaw, but you think people should accept you for you. I’m all for that. I am grateful for my friends who understand my personality. I take their bad with good as well. But that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t re-evaluate the “that’s just me” quality. In the end, despite my conclusion, I know I’ll come out a better me.

Hey, Rambo? If this has ANYTHING AT ALL to do with Jackles, let us assure you -- you could not possibly tell your frenemy often enough that she is a complete tool. It is something she needs to hear. Brutal honesty is clearly something her parents have failed to provide to her, resulting in a demented narcissist going through life believing herself to be the funniest, hottest, most clever and engaging human being ever to walk the face of the planet. Please, Rambo, do not hold fire on the Jackles front. Save her -- and the Internet -- from herself.


  1. Mary: only has the brain power to be introspective once a week.

  2. At least give her a tiny bit of credit for trying. Julia would only plays this card when there is some "playing the victim" work that needs to be done...

  3. It is sort of surprising that Mary is seemingly the only person in Julia's life that isn't afraid to call Julia out on her bullshit. It seems like Julia discards people pretty quickly once she figures out they're not fawning sycophants or people with connections she wants to exploit.

  4. Cannot hate this girl, sorry. This post showed more humility, maturity and self-awareness than Jackles would be capable of with a loaded gun to her head. Team Rambo.

  5. Mary might come across as a shallow bitch, but at least she's evolving, listening to feedback and trying to change. It just seems like Julia is devolving, regressing and going down hill in every way - writing, sanity, looks and career. Mary needs to ditch her before she drags her down even more.

  6. Meghan just announced this morning that they were picked up by NYNS. Yeah thanks, Meghan. We learned that last week. Does this girl do anything on time? She's always like a week or a year behind on the "tech" announcements.

    "BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!!! TMIweekly was picked up by NBC's new channel: New York NonStop. We're airing 6x/day, 7x/week - that's 168 TMIs/month" 9am 03/11

  7. The "When Being Jackled" bit made me cackle.

    How Jackles can't totally hate and fear herself by now is beyond me, but at least Mary shoves some truth her way.

  8. Um. . . Rambo? It's not called "brutal honesty." It's called being a bitch.

  9. This is why she'll succeed and Julia will fail. Kudos, Mary.

  10. I agree 10:16. Mary needs to ditch if only for her mental health. Seems to me that JA and MA were okay all along and it is MR that had the interpersonal issues with the gals. Again, I'm just guessing but the evidence appears to be stacking up.

    Also, I'll say it again. It seems that MR just cannot afford to take the trips with the other two gals. She's clearly the one supporting herself.

  11. Mary seems to be rather overbearing, everyone here sees mary in relation to julia [understandably] but I sense her bitchiness is full on whether we're talking julia or not. I also believe the commenter sometime back who implied the problem was actually between Mary and Meghan.

    I bristled when I read Mary's post on going to the ghetto to buy 'cheaper clothing and make-up' because I believed she did it as a passive aggressive move when asked to balance out her blogging $900.00 pairs of shoes.

    I also read a post on someone's blog about mary's 'ghetto' post and it was quite interesting [I will see if I can find it, it was not common]

    Her moving out of meghans was very quiet, not a peep from either of them, and yet mary blogs about her whereabouts with regularity. Plus, I thought it strange that the more Mary blogged the less Meghan blogged.

    I did not really see the 'exchanged glances' between Mary and Meghan during TMI's that showed they were against Julia.

    I think Julia and Meghan are actually friends, but I think Mary is the outsider, I do think they all read here, and I think Mary used her positive feedback from this site to bolster her opinion that she is the best. I think that attitude was problematic to her other musketeers.

    She explained going to New Canaan and played up the broke aspect, and yes, I could be wrong, but the manolos she is wearing in this series of posts, they're new. I don't believe she has a place to borrow those from.

  12. James, you say Mary is listening to feedback, from where? From here? Cause I would think that that would alienate her from her partners.

    I think (also) she does read here, and I think she does incorporate what people here comment on, I don't know if I would equate that as 'evolving' or just being savvy enough to know how to work your audience.

    I supported mary for some time, but then I started to feel as if she wasn't real, and was saying what she knew people wanted to hear. I have talked to somebody that knows her and he/she says Mary is not 'broke' as all the comments seem to imply.

  13. Mary responds here:

    And she has also responded to feedback on TMI. She practically got her hair chopped off because of TMI feedback - when the show first started commenters there skewered her all the time over her fried hair.

    And Mary is not "broke" how "normal" people are broke, but she obviously can't afford an apartment right now. I think most of her designer shoes, etc. were bought when she was making money from her bag business or given to her from her mom's designer resale shop.

  14. I don't know what quite to think of Miss Mary. Yes, she is shallow. Yes, her fashion commentatory leaves much to be desired. Yes, she does as much bitching about how busy they all are. Yes, I hate how she describes most restaurants she frequents as "the hot new place." And yes, I believe that if we were to ever met in person, I doubt she would like me very much - in part because I'm not thin/rich/socially connected enough.

    But on the other hand, I respect her for saying that she recognizes she can be bitchy. I also have respect for her being able to take criticism, and analyze it. Early on in the NS days, I remember the comments on Mary being nothing more than a dumb, trust fund blonde. It seems she's taken the opportunity to use the criticism, and attempt to change the way she comes off. Julia and Meghan, when criticized, both took "breaks from the noise of the internet." Sorry, but if it's your job (and um, your business plan) to be putting yourself out there (what with that whole "too much information" thing), isn't it a bit contradictory to be taking a break from the noise? Isn't the noise the thing that would help you improve your business?

    Granted, it isn't saying THAT much considering the company she associates with; but out of the three, Mary is the one I want most to succeed.