Wednesday, April 1, 2009

She. Walks. In. Beauty.

Don't ever doubt me, Beauty. My aim is true, and I am here to tell you that, as evidenced above, you are the finest creature to walk among us mere mortals. I bow down before you, Your Greatness. To the haters who think I am deliberately trying to cast you in an unfavorable light by posting these beautiful photos from your sacred day, I say Fie! Pox on you! 

You may count on seeing the most beautiful, sublime creature currently living clad in her perfect tutu, adorned by magnificent balloons honoring the LOVE statue with her presence just as soon as the Faerie Queene of the World herself is finished editing them and applying the final touches. Oh! Sigh! How I Love Her, Perfect Being, Queene Julia Allison!

32 comments:

  1. So, the fauxtograher, allows Yoolio to retouch her own photos?

    Hmmm. The plot thickens.

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  2. TJ! I know! What are we supposed to think here? It's nutty.

    1) It's been over a month since the birthday statue of love photo shoot went down, 2) Cruelia is a total control freak about everything, 3) fauxtographer is totally shit at his job if he thinks any of these photos are decent shots at all (total wantrepreneur, just like Cruelia and Co) and 4) how long until Cruelia demands all these recent BCBBFIASCO photos get taken down anyway? Srsly, 3, 2, 1...

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  3. TJ, get real. Only someone without an actual job has the time to buff out the countless bumps, spray on Adobe Skin Degreaser filter, and clonestamp the circles out from under her eyes.

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  4. What's interesting is that the photos that WM Marc uploaded yesterday don't appear to be retouched because they are...in a word...ghastly? But the first series of photos he uploaded, right after the two the parties, were far more flattering. hmmm. ((btw, not that they were really flattering))...

    Also, these "late to appear" photos seem to show off Julia smearing out her own name. They are unflattering.

    I don't buy that these are the photos Julia had in her possession. If she did, she'd trash them. No? I would trash them if they were mine!

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  5. It's going to take a lot more than retouching to make those photos flattering.

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  6. BWAHHH!!!
    These are total blackmail photos. I'd die if they were mine. She looks like a greasy, pimply, bloated hosebeast!!

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  7. The sad thing is, Julia is NOT unattractive. She just needs to take better care of her skin and lay off the spackled on makeup already. I don't have a problem with headbands or bobby pins, as I use both things, but that effin sparkly glitter caked on overmuch makeup is just so unflattering.

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  8. I don't think there's anything to read into here. It's normal and courteous for photographers to take down pictures his subjects ask him to. I've done the same. And the delay in time... the photos we first saw were uploaded live to his flickr. The rest weren't livestreamed and had to wait until processing.

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  9. Okay. Its me Meghan. I've been Meghan all along.

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  10. Don Juan NOOOOOOOOO you promised to take me on a date if you were in my town! Clearly you're bipolar.

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  11. And I'm Mary. You guys got me. I'm so ecsited to finaly reveel myself heer. Anyone heer wanna take my spinning class tomorow morning? You can be as skinny and healthy as me to! I'm more real then any of the other NS lifecasters. I don't pertend to sit on any thrown like Julia!

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  12. Okay. Its just sometimes I like to think I'm Meghan.

    Clearly I have issues. Who would date me?

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  13. Wow. What a relief to finally get that off my chest. That feels good.

    I'm SO, SO HAPPY right now.

    Thanks you guys.

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  14. All i know for certain is that RBNS sure has Cruelia going down on a lot of cakes today. It's less hawt, more embarrassing. Srsly Cruelia, the penis, live it, know it (in private please). I assume she truly is a heterosexual, and am not being heterosexist here.

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  15. FINE. I'M ACTUALLY JULIA. Damn. Who wants to date us?

    ME. I meant me!

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  16. Can we please do away with the little insidery PCGC jokes? They're interesting to about three people and clog up the threads.

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  17. Anon 4:46: SECONDED!

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  18. Agreed. Weren't funny the first time.

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  19. Disagreed. They really made me laugh the first time.

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  20. I think the PGCG insanity is what happens when people get tired of saying the SAME THINGS about Julia over and over and over again. People are bound to get a little loopy when the person they're parsing NEVER EVER EVER CHANGES. Julia really is the most tedious, boring person on the planet... besides us losers of course ;) Has she EVER done anything out of character or unpredictable? (and I don't mean childish dumbassery like riding the baggage claim carousel) You know... like show up somewhere on time, be discreet about something (ANYTHING!) or show someone a common courtesy?

    Didn't think so. So carry on with your PCGC inanity... I understand.

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  21. twitter.com/wmmarc

    twitter.com/Featherbrained

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  22. Anony 5:26, Where is the news? This exact info is in the post above, though missing the madlibs...

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  23. Charslie posted more in the previous entry's comments. Check it out.

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  24. Gwyneth's Inner AspectApril 1, 2009 at 5:37 PM

    I'm sorry for this, but what is PGCG?

    Please?

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  25. Oh god. You must go back to the previous thread. Charlsie's latest tale involves Julia attempting to return freebies (including PANTIES) in exchange for gift cards. I just can't even begin to wrap my mind about how pathetic that our faaaaabulous princess is engaging in such shady low rent behavior. How very un Blair Walforf of her.

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  26. Yoolio is a panty thief!
    (laughing myself silly with this one)

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  27. Note Jules..

    No store allows returning panties you dipshit!

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  28. PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!
    PANTY THIEF!!!!!!!

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  29. all these photos look like stills from a nasty porn. and i get this strange feeling she knew that when the photos were being taken. just saying.

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  30. SO KLASSY YALL... get free gifts from PR companies, try to pawn them off for cash. There was a story on some girl who worked for a ladymag doing the saaame thing on Ebay. Funny how that's suddenly an "intern duty".

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  31. The DEFINITIVE portrait. Half Morticia, half Gollum, and all Julia.

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  32. Thank-you Mean Girl. That was very well put. I couldn't agree more.

    'Parsing" - that's what we're doing here.

    We're parsing Julia. Oh, sorry. I mean NS. We're 'parsing' NS.

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