Thursday, May 28, 2009

Yulia: Ancient photos from a million miles away


Me Scaring Innocent Teenage Boys @ Prom, 1999.
It’s Prime Prom Season, which you know is my favorite season of all, next to Wedding Season. Actually prom is pretty much like getting married, but without the whole “monogamy” thing. And you get to wear colors.

Blah, blah, blah. She go on about emailing her photos (which she will only find through the Gogol image search and email to herself). I too bored to care.

I do like that Poofy manage to find shot of her that feature Old Face and was taken from the surface of Neptune so we can no really see what she look like before she get the 367 plastic surgeries and injections that she say she not get until she say she get in HBO documentary, like that was always the story.

She is wily, this one in the light blue.

I go take 17 innocent teenage goats to "prom" now, if you know what I mean.

89 comments:

  1. if by 'prom' you mean 'kiev beast and vodka orgy fun' then yes, know what you mean

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  2. God, what a twat, running into the middle of a photo of the boys to get attention. Then posting it TEN YEARS LATER with a bizarre self-congratulatory commentary. And, no, dearie, we didn't know that prom season is your favorite season of all, but maybe mumsey and daddy can find a nice doctor to listen to you talk about it.

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  3. "...before she get the 367 plastic surgeries and injections that she say she not get until she say she get in HBO documentary, like that was always the story."

    Oh Russian Girl. That was classic. I am still laughing.

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  4. anon! amen! is she regressing? she's gone from college to hs now...whats next, 'me being an obnoxious attention whore at my seventh grade winter dance! you all know how being 12 was my favorite year!'

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  5. All the world is high school

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  6. @10:94 All the world is pre-k

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  7. In all honesty this kind of look at me shit is ok FOR AN 18 YEAR OLD. It annoys us because she is still acting this way, ten years later.

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  8. @10:13 I am not sure it's even ok for an 18yo

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  9. 1. What kind of dorky weird pose is she doing there? What an absolute fool.

    2. I meant to ask this question in the lip dub thread. When she makes her brother and father film her lip dub for her in the ski lift, is she like, singing out like? Silently mouthing the words? It has to be weird for the people with her since, umm, they can't hear the music.

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  10. Mary Rambin's Brown HairMay 28, 2009 at 10:32 PM

    Hi,

    Just wanted to be brutally honest with you all and say stop with the hating. I, as mary's real hair came to deal with it and you all [ya'll] should too!

    Julia looks fabulous in this picture, admit it, I 'pulled' the dress for this and if I do say so myself she looks great because it is taken from so far away you can't see detail. [TOTALLY MY IDEA]

    She is my friend!!!! Even though I stare at her strangely in our TMI videos, I love her. We will always be friends [as long as I need her for recognition] believe me, I am an expert in everything I say and do-- my dad is shit-rich and my mom will pay my bills forever--anyway...if I send you something, you better send me that thank you or I will *'houston hotel' your ass.

    *not as fun as it sounds. believe my texas ass!

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  11. What is "wedding season"?

    for serious.

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  12. Good job 10:32. Spoken like true a Houston pendeha.

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  13. Huh, you mean june?

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  14. PP

    If I haven't told you lately. I fucking love your limitless vocab!

    You should get paid for this!

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  15. Oh, btw, just what is a pendeha?

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  16. depends on what texican/fruit picker/wildcatter you ask

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  17. Mary's brown hairMay 28, 2009 at 10:54 PM

    Uhm, I made it clear to both Julia and Meghan, I will blog about colonics but eveybody else [fruit pickers and wildcatters] going up my ass has to blog it themselves!

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  18. I am always open for business. Everyone's invited! (except PP)

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  19. Is that even her? I can't tell.

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  20. you know she scanned that while she was "vacationing" in chicago @ her rents' place

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  21. 11:08, God, you are probably so right.

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  22. 1108 omg youre right. she probably sat in her old pink bedroom in her prom dress, listening to deep blue something and when in rome, swinging between fond memories and depressing regret. two gallons of grigio later she's calling her ex-boyfriends singing ani difranco songs and demanding an apology for not loving her enough. maybe a skim of the yearbooks. watching gleaning the cube and gleeking herself over christian.

    best.vaca.evah.

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  23. 11:08

    Tots she found that while she was at her parents house. I thought the exact same thing ( I swear). It was probs on top of the piano or something and in between bites of her mothers gaucomole cranberry disaster, she scanned it.

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  24. Anyone who takes the prom seriously deserves the utter failure in life they will eventually become. Seriously, you know her life was all downhill from there.

    Please, no one marry this person. She will become Bridezilla and devour the internet whole. Can you imagine the pictures? It's a day devoted to HER HER HER! It's like every fucking dream she has come true. And 400 guests will be held captive for hours, days even, you know she'll turn that shit into a 3 day long affair.

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  25. @11:08

    Maybe, but I suspect the Sacred Scrapbooks are always close to hand. I wonder if daddy took the photo, though, just documenting the wonderful life of the Daughter of a Princeton Graduate and Law Partner.

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  26. I thought it was "Sub Prime Prom Season"?!

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  27. PP: That might be your best comment ever. That is a really hysterically funny mental picture you just painted there.

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  28. Prom Season? As a 28 year old? Really? Most writer ladies I know were stoner weirdos in high school, and most 28 year old writers with successful creative careers are racking up their first set of awards, grants and achievements. Pathetic.

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  29. Anon 11:08 (Julia's Photoshop Tools)May 28, 2009 at 11:56 PM

    and then she typed the lyrics into an AIM window with He Who Shall Not Be Named.


    I PROMISE YOU
    I PROMISE YOU



    i will!!!!11111

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  30. If she'd had that picture on her hard drive for years, we'd have seen it 100 times already. There are too many element she loves:

    1. She's in it.
    2. She's wearing a hideous ball gown.
    3. Men are giving her attention because she's HOT, people!
    4. Sort of gangsta signs; she's so FUNNY, people!

    She definitely got it from her parents' house.
    What a fun vacation!

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  31. Mary's brown hairMay 29, 2009 at 12:15 AM

    This is just like my blog! I do all this work and make a whole comment by myself, and everything is spelled correctly and all you[s] want to talk about is JULIA.

    Fuck that, I am so better than her! Fuck you all, I'll get my friend @gawker to post something. You'll see, I will win this privileged bitch contest. Fuck, I'll take down pointy and her new little dog too!

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  32. @Mary's brown hair

    Now, now, don't be so contrary, Mistress Mary. We know your ma and pa are totes richer than Julia's. And we know that Julia is all talk but you are the party! It's just that...well, kinda hard to phrase this on a family-oriented site such as this...every guy dreams of a gal who likes to...well, you know, to take a tube up the ass. Now, now, don't blush! So we don't talk about you much, at least the guys don't, cause we're dreamin' of meetin' up with ya for a little of that rare delight! Yup, and well there's the other part, uh, ... the ball gag? That's OK, right, 'cause even though you say the most interesting things in the world, well, it just sorta goes along with that whole spread-the-cheeks thing. K? So really it's just lust fer ya Texas ass that keeps us quiet. Really. You're the honey buns of TMI, girl, and don't ever forget it or doubt our love for ya!

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  33. Mary's Brown HairMay 29, 2009 at 12:48 AM

    That's texan for I love you!

    You really like me don't you? That's all that matters! Next bikini shot I'll show you the brazilian I charged...totes worth it, and I had a credit and all!

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  34. That picture looks photoshopped like she placed herself in some other photo (judging by the blurry edges of the dress).

    And sweetie. You are almost 30. Who gives a fuck about prom?

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  35. @Mary's Brown Hair

    We do love ya, babe, more than beating a wetback bloody at a Sunday barbeque, and honey, that's sayin' something down Houston way!

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  36. Julia's Exiled Jiminy CricketMay 29, 2009 at 12:52 AM

    She is tuck in a time loop that begins with her prom and ends with her college graduation. She wants so badly to be that girl who marries right out of college and is pregnant a year later. Since that has not happened she has willed herself (in her mind anyway) into a holding pattern where she's still That Girl in college and she's trying with all her might to stay that way with the injections of God knows what into her face, the ridiculous withholding of sex, dressing like a fictional high school tv character, all the silly inspirational quotes that she uses to justify her infantile behavior....a smarter person than me could write a really great horror movie about her.

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  37. Three hours on whether or not it's photoshopped beeeeeeeeegiiiiiiiins now>>>>>

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  38. Oh, I'm gonna blog about that, beating a wetback bloody, mind if I credit RBNS with that one?

    Ya'll know how I like to credit my inspirations.

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  39. @Mary's brwn h

    Honey, help youself to that quote, I'm a gentleman and a Longhorn too if you catch my drift and all I ask in return is that when you're wigging that finger around just think o' me a-pinin' fer yer special love.

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  40. pendeja = pubic hair, literally, but in general is used as way to call someone an asshole or an idiot, blahblah etc. and not only "fruit pickers" or "texicans" use that word, so don't be rude. but whatever.

    In any event, why is prom season this woman's favorite season? she's been out of highschool for TEN YEARS. TEN. not to mention, prom season is OVER for most students.

    She can't even get her long-outdated princess obsessions right.

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  41. She was scaring guys then and she's scaring guys now. Must be a comfort to her that she hasn't changed from her prom self in at least ONE respect.

    I do believe she is walking like an Egypt-shun in that redonkulous pic. However, the fingers appear to be pointing, so she may just be signaling that she goes both ways. (I suspect she was vacationing on the Isle of Lesbos.)

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  42. Honey Mustard Nail DipMay 29, 2009 at 1:17 AM

    Isn't this from the prom that took place right after C-Dan dumped her ass? I bet she was having SO. MUCH. FUN.

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  43. Which Tennessee Williams character was it that went on talking about her old gentlemen callers, long after she had entered middle age? That's sort of what Julia has turned into.

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  44. Glass Menagerie! Laura! left alone in the dark at home when Brother Britt joins the merchant marine.

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  45. On a more trivial note, this thread started making so much more sense when, around comment 11:24, I stopped reading prom as porn...

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  46. Julia's Photoshop ToolsMay 29, 2009 at 3:44 AM

    have y'all seen this video? i think it's when she started to turn 40.


    http://vimeo.com/256650

    also, she sounds like a complete and total diva in it.

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  47. Julia's Photoshop ToolsMay 29, 2009 at 3:48 AM

    ... and because i'm really bored and procrastinating from finals, i thought i'd contribute something to this community that i love so much: a very flattering screengrab from the aforementioned video.

    http://i44.tinypic.com/14ayg48.png

    that's her WITH lots of makeup, people. i can't fathom that she looks worse without it.

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  48. Wow,Julia's Photoshop Tools, that screengrab gives tranny makeup a whole new meaning.

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  49. @Julia's Photoshop Tools

    That still is perfection. And that's from back in the day when she was supposedly good-looking.

    She must have looked even worse than that picture tonight, when she got off Harvard boy's motorcycle, leaving a ring of grease paint and wang hair behind in the helmet.

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  50. I goofed folks..

    JA is now deleting the embeded ext data from pictures she is posting..

    She is really determined to continue the lying games..

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  51. dude, i have seen that prom picture before. i think around the time that she was dating jakob, or before. maybe even when she had that old blog on her web site. and i remember it because, you know, i was impressed that she was sooooo popular and had so many boyfriends in high school ;-)

    but julia (because i know you read this) that deleting exif data thing = pathetic. seriously girl, get off the internet and get a life. you are a halfway decent reporter, meaning that if you were actually willing to work (and eat some crow to rebuild the bridges you've apparently burnt) you'd probably do ok.

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  52. narcissist headbandMay 29, 2009 at 8:45 AM

    ugh, prom. what person over age 18 even thinks about this? and that photo makes me angry. i HATE the fake "gangsta" thing that she does, for a billion reasons. maybe even more than the kissy-face, the blow-kiss and the braying donkey.

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  53. I remember when I was 18, 19 - everyone used to say, Oh that Ethel Egg, she's the most attractive of all her sisters. Then I turned 25 and I had a little nervous breakdown because I couldn't believe I was SO OLD!

    OLD! I was 25!

    OO-OO-OOLd - hear the echo - of being 20-five-five-five-five ...

    Then somehow I got through my 30's, I turned into an independent, happy woman. I had just as many boyfriends as I'd had in my 20's but I didn't put up with the shit sex and the bad behaviour and the put-downs. If they fucked me off, instead of just fucking me well, I got rid of them.

    Now that I'm 41, I'm single, happy, got my own great place to live ...

    I look at JA and I see that stupid 19 year old that I was.

    Julia Allison Baugher, get over your own damn self, you are nearly 30 years old, get a fucking life and stop pretending that you're a teenager. God, I just want to slap you. Stop relying on your parents and get a proper job and stand on your own two feet.

    Stop playing games with men - they HATE that and you're not going to get a husband with your tutus and headbands.

    And lastly, Jezuz, for fucks sake, start masturbating. It'll release some of that pressure out of your overcooked brain. You might start thinking straight.

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  54. I probably could have framed that better - frustration overcame me.

    However, the sentiments remain.
    (Also the swearing parts. I can't stop the swearing.)

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  55. Also, I think that move is the Wilmette White Boy Shrug.

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  56. Also, she's got some page called "recs" on her site/sight/cite (maybe it should be called wrecks/rex, who knows, whatever, strange, xoxo) and she's wearing that horrible yellow nail polish in one of the photos. Not that I'm internet stalking or something, but, passive advertising with the seaworld yellow polish?

    I know FAR too much about Julia Allison Baugher's daily life and it's about time that I stopped.

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  57. According to Jules twitter a Ducatti is the sam as a Harley. I find that so strange!
    Have a great day! XO

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  58. Ethel, ditto. My interest in her is waning to nothing. Honestly? I don't even care about Julia's shit anymore. I just come to RBNS for the lolarious commenters.

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  59. "Dead Souls," indeed, Russian Girl.

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  60. Commenters FTW

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  61. Did she have a motorcycle date with Harvard? Missed it.

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  62. juliaallison: @erinmstyles ahhhh it was!!! Especially since I was wearing heels, a vintage skirt and a Chanel bag. Carrie would be so proud. Hahha
    about 2 hours ago from TwitterFon
    juliaallison: Re: last night's motorcycle date - @MsFitzSTYLIST - a Harley, actually. It was my first time on a bike!! Oh yes, I liked. How could I not?!
    about 2 hours ago from TwitterFon

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  63. Ethel, AMEN! I am 25 right now and went through that awkward 'I have to be more than a hot girl' phase about 2 years ago. Now I have a challenging job, my own apartment which I pay for from the money I make at said job, and actual relationships that are built on respect.

    Getting by on your looks is cute and even fun when your 19, but there's so much more to life. She's such a terrible example to so many people, from older man who think they can manipulate and control any younger woman to the young woman who are growing up and watching her and learning to act like asshats. It's so frustrating to me that she can't see anything outside of herself and hasn't grown at all over the past decade. Sigh. She manages to be maddeningly frustrating and incredibly banal and predictable at once.

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  64. I don't understand a grown woman squeeling about her dates on the internet. Do you all?

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  65. At this point, Jule's credibilty is at an all-time low so I am thinking she took a pedi-cab to the GU reunion and massaged the facts into a date on a Ducatti edition Harley. Pathetic.

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  66. On a completely random note, I still can't get over how Meghan can afford a loft like this when she's job-free and yet constantly toots the old "I live on my own money!" horn:
    http://vimeo.com/1182377

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  67. TJ, if they took place at all. JA has crossed over into delusional la-la-land.

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  68. She purchased that loft while working at the hedge fund. Meghan never rented in NYC. She bought instantly. Plenty of families with money buy their kids apartments to live in, in NYC because they consider it a good investment (I'd debate that but whatevs...). She might pay maintanence or something but she didn't purchase that apartment. It's financially impossible.

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  69. You're right.

    I missed all the hoopla over night. Are you guys saying that she went back to that old photo she claimed was from her current (family home) vacation and DELETED the code that revealed the time stamp?

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  70. No she is this morning now posting her iphone photos only after taking out the ext embedded data..

    I think she read a previous thread here and found out about the ext data stuff..

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  71. Thanks anon 10:26. Wow. Is she is a lying sack of you know what.

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  72. Ethel: She masturbates regularly. Does anyone doubt that she masturbates to her own image? I would lay money on it.

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  73. In the photo by the seal you can see she is in white patent leather shoes (ick!) and a short plaid skirt. Of course. I am sure she is fitting in so well with her former classmates...

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  74. She did share that prom image a while back. On her old blog.

    My sources tell me she was with her family (mom AND dad) during her supposed "vacation." Julia's mom is very concerned about her right now.

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  75. WOW. The next time someone comes on this board and says that WE are losers and JEALOUS of Julia, I will refer that person to this post. This. girl. is. dreaming. about. high. school. Not just high school but her high school PROM. How can she not feel like a loser? 1999!! 10 years ago. Think about how long ago that was. People were worried about Y2K then! (doesn't that seem quaint now?) We have had two presidents since then. INSANE.

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  76. Total Jing,

    *She* should read *Daddy Parikh* bought the apartment.

    I work in Financial Services and know for a FACT that her income from her Hedge Fund time could not afford an apartment in that building. Even the brightest graduates aren't paid that much. And we have seen how smart (snicker) she really is.

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  77. That's what I meant to imply albeit lazily, Web20Morons.

    That's a Parikh investment apartment.

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  78. I mean, she moved into that apartment following college. It's trust fund money.

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  79. She is now posting quotes FROM HERSELF.

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  80. 10:17
    i'm green with envy. that loft is amazing.

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  81. I was watching SATC reruns last night and the night before. One of them was the episode where Carrie rode a motorcycle dressed in Prada. Coincidence? I think not.

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  82. Meghan did not live in her current Soho loft until a year ago. She roomed with the infamous bleach blond Krystal Kahler at 23rd and Park for a time on her retrun to NYC after finding Korbel heir boyfriend in his bed with another woman.

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  83. (For any grammar-lovers out there, Carrie was the one in Prada, not the motorcycle. Um, er, oops?)

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  84. http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/

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  85. Meghan found her bf in bed with someone else? That is sad. Shouldn't happen to anyone. But it does. Move on, instead of being bitter.

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  86. There is a story at
    http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/
    http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/
    http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/
    http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/
    http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/
    http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/
    http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/
    http://www.zmogo.com/web/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/

    Everyone got that? We done now?

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  87. Shut up, Partypants. Jesus you are annoying. Look at you always trying to be the alpha commenter here.

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  88. That pose? My 6yo niece does that. It must come from something on The Cartoon Channel.

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