Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Julia: She Never Truly Goes Away

And I wonder if this Go-Kart guy went to Harvard and would be willing to wait 11 dates? He seems quite titillated by her spunk in the end. Also, she seems awfully uptight about her hair in this segment, as though she's afraid if she pulls it too tightly behind her head, her scalp pelt will become embarrassingly dislodged.

79 comments:

  1. I got to say that this was not toooo annoying.

    The editing was okay- and it was much better that they were not on that amateur set.

    I actually watched the whole thing- the only thing that made me cringe was the part where she screamed go carting in the beginning- totally unnecessary.

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  2. And the hamming it up as though she's scared when it's clear she's just hamming it up. Bad actress.

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  3. These shows are boring because of them. You got that, TMI girls??

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  4. Jiminy Earwig, Julia's Nagging ConscienceMay 26, 2009 at 7:40 AM

    Oh yeah, Manhattan socialite-wannabes (whom I imagine to be their desired demographic) just LOVE Peter Pan Syndrome guys who take them out go-karting. They seem to be pushing hard to be relevant to the college crowd (apparently their desired demographic). If any of them had a track record of successful dating or a career that actually required a college degree, their efforts might not be so laughable.

    Who am I kidding? They would still be irrelevant clowns. [NOTE: I couldn't be arsed to actually watch this or any other TMI video, so my opinions are based on their video titles and the irrational hatred they inspire in me.

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  5. Is anyone else just sort of bored with them?

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  6. PP: Yes. It is becoming a daily struggle to give a shit one way or another.

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  7. Since nothing's recent, how about this?

    "How is it I'm never, EVER on time to any meeting or dinner or function - but I pay my rent 2 weeks early, every single time??
    9:01 PM May 23rd from web"

    What I want to know is where she is getting the money for rent.

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  8. @8:36: So much money. So much opportunity.

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  9. Have I missed something? Why hasn't Meghan posted for days? (Not that you can really tell the difference)

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  10. Hey, Jiminy Earwig. It ain't irrational.

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  11. Meaghan is probably busy taking care of Lilly.

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  12. Jiminy Earwig: I think Julia's desired audience are girls like herself: girls with no standards and willing to date literally any guy just so they can say they have a boyfriend. So they would probably like the go-karting. Also, it gives them a chance to show that they are "scrappy," which is a trait that rom coms have taught them that men look for in a woman. Never mind that Julia is a grade-A overbearing high-mainteince freak who is incapable of having real relationships.

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  13. According to "rom coms" the only way you'll ever get a man is to play head games and look like Kate Hudson.

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  14. @pp: Mr. Smokey Cupcakes will be appalled to know that our 8 years together have been a waste since I don't play headgames or look like a chubby-faced Muppet.

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  15. I love how this guy has to tell her not to start dropping auto terminology because guys will know she's bluffing and call her out on it. She's done this before, please revisit this post http://rebloggingnonsociety.blogspot.com/2009/04/yulia-no-plastic-surgery.html for her doing the same and some commenter views on it even then. It isn't cute, it makes it very obvious you're trying too hard to impress them or be the kind of "unique" girl they'd like, and automatically gives them the upper hand. It would be a different story if she simply had a wide range of interests and even a glossed-over level of knowledge about different things, but this girl will literally adopt and parrot whatever it takes to make a guy like her because she's apparently that insecure. It's sad. :(

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  16. Repost of comment there since that thread is pretty long and they're near the end:

    Anonymous said...

    Hey ahem JUels you effing idiot:

    Grated rotors, changed oil, sparked some plugs ;)

    What is grated brake rotors?

    From a girl who took Automotive in HS..oh come on come up with better lies than this..you effing awake for 18 hours..use that brain cell of yours..
    April 30, 2009 6:41 PM

    Anonymous said...

    That's her attempt at being "quirky" again. Look! She's a female and can talk automotive jargon! Except she can't and there are maybe millions of girls that can, and well, because they actually love cars.
    April 30, 2009 7:06 PM
    Anonymous said...

    Julia loves that guy's car because he spent a lot of money on it. She will morph into whatever interests the man in her presence at the moment.
    D= caring nurse
    Car man = car chick
    Tech geek = blogger
    April 30, 2009 8:06 PM

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  17. I wonder what she will mighty morphin into when she meets a right wing millionaire Chicago lawyer?

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  18. I don't think she'd see it as a disconnect. JA has no real convictions of her own, just those she borrows from people she wants to impress.

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  19. Anon 9:16: She did the same thing when she was stalking tech boys. She'd drop whatever jargon she sponged off the floors of their discussions, sounding like an total idiot, her "talk to me about Ruby on Rails" as pick-up advise was particularly pathetic/transparent. Same thing with media and marketing buzz words; she drops them like fleas from a infested dog in a disjointed and spastic manner that makes it clear she's trying to impress with her up-to-the-minute catchphrases, spouting them in streams. Yet ... titty-blinded professors fall for it and even defend her hackneyed crap as revolutionary:
    "Omg students, who knew? You can not just sit in front of your computer working on your FB profile! You have to go out and actually meet people face to face!!! That is Julia Allison's brilliant BRILLIANT offering to you young people who are all about social network web 2.0 but didn't know you actually have to meet people in person too!! Oh Julia, you are not only adorable but incredibly INCREDIBLY intelligent. Thank you for addressing my class, I can tell they are all immeasurably delighted and appreciative of your unique and superior insights."

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  20. Back when Meemaw Alice was young, we had a word for swing-titted wannabes who showed up at defcon trying to talk about suse and ctf: scenewhore.

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  21. Oh, please, someone take the handle Swing-Titted Wannabe.

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  22. Damn. I need to change my bio to "human username generator".

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  23. Hey, it's a better contribution to humanity than anything Julia Allison Baugher does.

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  24. See, now...that one wasn't that bad. The huge ass Go Kart ad that didnt drop down until a third of the way was rather annoying, but overall JA seemed relax and natural, for her. The thing is, when she posted those few pics on the NS site about go karts, couldnt she have just tossed out a few lines indicating she was filming a Very Special TMI and maybe some teaser lines to get us interested rather than posting a picture of a go kart with no explanation. I must be expecting too much.

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  25. Her hair is fucking redonkulous. She looks like Go Cart Barbie.

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  26. Now here's something weird. I find it strangely refreshing that she's gone silent. It's almost as if she never existed. I thought my inner snark might miss her, but au contraire, I feel at peace and don't have the slightest desire to ruin this sensation by watching TMI weakly. I like the world without Julia. Without the braying it's even possible to hear the chirping birds outside my window. Maybe she could extend her leave to, say, forever?
    This probably makes me the worst hater ever, but think about it: If even the haters feel a sense of relief when you're gone, that shows just how AWFUL a blogger/media "personality" you are. Time to go and smell the undocumented roses.

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  27. Ironic,

    I feel exactly the same. Sweet relief.

    Also, seems as thought Meghan has given up on NS, right? Good for her. Maybe she's working hard on the Indian Skin Care line she mentioned working on, along with that tech conference she's planning for the fall.

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  28. But...will we commenters still remain friends? What will bind us together without the sweet sweet snark???

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  29. Julia theme song..Tears of a Clown

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  30. Yeah, this one wasn't so bad! I like the dude calling her out on stuff. Their banter was not cringe-inducing. Can't will myself to hate.

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  31. If JAButt stops blogging, she won't be missed and I think she knows it. It will soon enough be as if she never existed, not useful even as a cautionary tale. There are so many competing interweb blips out there, she'll sink deeper into obscurity and fast.
    Now if only she would leverage this de facto and step off. Not much of a legacy, but whatevs.

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  32. Go back to your hovel, anon troll.

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  33. oh and Jules I do not think MahaloDaily producers would be two kind of you stealing music from their prodduciotns..dumb shit

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  34. Julia's options at this point are basically go work for her dad or start dating Criss Angel.

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  35. I think I'm asleep. Things are getting so dull. ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

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  36. Hopefully she didn't steal it, because Calacanis has already publicly beeetchslapped her oncee.

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  37. We need a dlisted style "OPEN POST: Hosted by Lilly" or something just to talk shit about jaba until she returns.

    Or someone start commenting your favorite idiot quote of Jabs.

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  38. Now is the time that we study before photos so we can figure out which procedure Julia got done while she was on "vacation."

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  39. "I can't go out looking like this." This prompts further pontification/rationalization on the separation of her two sides. "Why would you want to present yourself in an unattractive light? I like being seen as attractive. I also know that I have an expiration date. Maybe seven years."
    -Media Bistro

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  40. "I have to meet Ben Goldhirsh," said Allison mentioning the magazine's wealthy founder. "I am going to bed him and wed him." It didn't happen.
    @Media Bistro

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  41. My hunch is that Megs and Julia are together in Santa Cruz or Cali somewhere. Megs mentioned going there for the holiday furing one of their TMI episodes.

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  42. "I’m leaving in about four hours for a REAL three(ish) day non-lifecast’d vacation."

    As opposed to the 20 other way _overblogged_ all expense paid trips you've taken the past six months.

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  43. Come on, Party Pants. Those were WORKING vacations. Hanging out in piano bars and making googly eyes at married billionairs is HARD WORD. Wearing Tent dresses while speaking to a room full uninterested bloggers at SXSW, is HARD work. Giving out TMI t-shirts at CES, is HARD work. Taking pictures with women wearing capris and oversized t-shirts, is HARD work. Avoiding blogging about any of those trips is REALLY HARD WORK. Producing no content for your life cast is HARD work. Avoiding work is work.

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  44. Yes, this didnt suck too much, Jascar scream at the beginning did not surprise me in the least. Although, they should stop using Mary's intro-- she ain't moving from freebie town any time soon.

    Mary is moving around her comments. Ha! She moves the good ones to the top and leaves critical ones towards the bottom, despite whether you select newest or oldest.

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  45. omg...rebloggingmorethanmary here I come

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  46. Mary has little to no comments on her blog, save for her "thank me for freebies" post last week. Is that where she's rearranging?

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  47. Why is her blog so boring? I feel like I'm reading the food diary of Sue Ellen Ewing.

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  48. Yeah. It's like a weight watchers workbook. I own a few.

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  49. It's worse than the "Your Own Pages" from Highlights magazine.

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  50. Woman's World Magazine; the abridged edition.

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  51. HAHAHAHA, omg my Tante used to read that all the time. Every cover was some lady in mom pants talking about "EAT OFF THE LBS! Lucinda lost 3 lbs You Can Too!"

    And nonsociety is Tiger Beat.

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  52. the passive aggressiveness is back! she must have noticed we were calling her boring.

    http://morethanmary.com/post/113344355

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  53. Georgie Girl http://www.georgiegirlnyc.com/, Mary's BFF, posts more than Julia and Meghan combined and she has a FULL TIME JOB. No wonder she refuses to babysit Lily any longer.

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  54. not going to lie. ilikejuliaallison site is really funny.

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  55. So the only spam we are allowed to have is the juliaallisonteachesdumbwhoresbrayel website?

    Awesome.

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  56. @TJ: Georgie Girl is on a leave of absence from her job right now (I hate myself for knowing that), but even when she is working she posts at least as ofter as the NS girls.

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  57. PP: But it IS funny and it features Abigale the Happy Whale! Also, I could be wrong, but it looks like a good piece of satire to me. It's on a level with the Petroleum Mag "machine of happiness" post. Damn these people if I'm wrong. In that case they shall experience the slanket of wrath.

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  58. @2:41

    I think it's hilarious that first JA thought ilikejuliaallison was a legit fan site and then she ammended her post to say that maybe it's sarcastic but that's okay.

    Poor gal. She was so excited to be loved at first. I actually felt bad for her.

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  59. I guess I have interest for only one reblog of Julia.

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  60. The ilikejuliaallison site is hilarious.

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  61. I think I'm too cranky to appreciate it today. Tomorrow it'll probably give me lulzilepsy.

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  62. I like just saying "the slanket of wrath."

    Ripe for a new username.

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  63. Nice moment when Matt says he took his girlfriend on a go-carting date and dipshit says, "Really?", like the entitled twat she is (psst, Julia? That's the idea of the episode...the idea isn't just any excuse to put you in front of a camera) . Props to Matt for conveying just the right attitude towards this poodle in a tutu.

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  64. Okay, so I'm kind of obsessed with http://ilikejuliaallison.tumblr.com/. The thing is I think whoever is writing it DOES kind of like Julia - they go easy on her, or easier than we do here - but also knows she's a flaming nutbag. Basically, I've decided Meghan is writing it. It explains the lack of posts from her this week.

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  65. The writing is WAY too good to be Meghan. It's someone taking the piss in a very funny and sly way.

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  66. I agree with Jacy, if Meghan was able to write like this, her blog would actually be readable.

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  67. Seriously bunnies, I am worried about the dress lending situation this week. Jankles needs a showstopper piece for the reunion and there isn't much time. Which designer will be tricked into loaning five gowns? BJ, Gustavo, Ilus? Inquiring minds need to know.

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  68. Hee, the devil in me wants it to be Betsey Johnson.

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  69. TJ

    Mary has found that whn she posts pictures of herself ina bathing suit, she'll get Comments [done it twice in a week] then she had kyle king post after her controversey over her hurt feelings....but smell the makings of Julia all over this,

    Mary knows she is going to be featured in the post, a couple of days before she yells at all her readers and gives etiquette lessons to create buzz....gets 130 comments, when called on it she states she doesn't need controversey, but TJ is right, it is dead over there, if It weren't for sandy sharma she would have no comments at all

    all the while she tells the post she's getting shitloads of unique page views.

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  70. lulzilepsy and brayel(le?) can you stop pp, my stomach hasn't has this much of a workout since abs like 2 weeks ago.

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  71. She also says "really?" because she couldn't imagine a GIRL ever wanting to do that sort of thing (read: socialization crisis) but thinks she's zomg the most awesomest girl EVER for finding THA PERFECT DATE FOR A GUYYYY!!! Dumb girl.

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  72. Wow, that ilikejuliaallison site is WAY too sly and well-read and culturally literate for either of the NS twits to be involved. It's very funny. The photoshopped Julia Allison Barbie/wedding-cake-topper is genius.

    Any chance of putting it as a link on "Sites we like"???

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  73. Jabbers' cruelty knows no bounds. She's giving me exactly what I've wanted since the day I first learned of her existence: her absence. When she inevitably brays her return to the internets, my soul will be crushed anew.

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  74. The fact that Julia relies so much on stereotypes for both men and women may reveal why she has such a hard time relating to and interacting with either sex.

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  75. Haha partypants, why dont u like the site?

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  76. Dyspeptic: It's there at the top.

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  77. Nonny 4:47, I think you're onto something there. I've always found it ridiculous that she thinks she's some sort of pioneer woman, braying endlessly about the special snowflake way she enjoys both high heels and technology. Was she recently thawed out from cryogenic stasis?

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